One of the hardest things to deal with is loosing your wife.  You based your life around living with her and then one day you find that things took a wrong turn somewhere.  It is very important for a husband and wife to work together to keep the relationship working and alive.  Unfortunately, sometimes we take for granted the things that a wife does and how she is the glue that holds things together.  When we neglect a person for so long, it is only natural for her to feel unwanted and unappreciated.  Sometimes the end result is that your wife will leave you.

One thing to keep in mind is that all hope is not lost as long as long as there is still some communication open between the two of you.  The first thing to do is to figure out why she left you.  You may not want to go directly to her for this as her wounds may still be fresh.  She may not be ready to talk to you just yet. Sometimes it can help to talk to her friends and family.  You need to be prepared to hear what others will have to say about your relationship and do not get defensive.  They may tell you things that you do not want to hear about how you treated her in the relationship.  This is a good time for learning what you did wrong.  This will allow you to see where you need to change in order to make things work.

You want to give her some space before you try contacting her.  This can be one of the most difficult things you do in the process of trying to get your ex back.  Our natural instinct is to try to grab onto that person and hold on as hard as you can so she won't get away.  But in all reality by doing something like that, you push her further away and she becomes more and more annoyed with you.  You need to back off and give her some space.  This will allow her to think about your relationship and miss you.  This also allows you to take time to reflect back on your relationship with her.  Remember what made the two of you fall in love and try to get back to being the person that she fell in love with.  After you've given her some space, try making a casual call to her.  Tell her you're just calling to see how she's doing and how things are going and if she needs anything.  Don't bring up the problems that the two of you had were the reasons that you got separated.

Think of it as baby steps.  Start your conversations often for small, keeping them short with light topics.  This will allow her to gain back a little bit of trust in you and she won't feel like she's being pressured into coming back. Once the two of you have begun to open the lines of communication again ask her to meet you for lunch.  This allows her to feel like she is a level playing ground.  Asking her out to dinner may seem like you're asking her out on a date or you're trying to be romantic and she may not be ready for that yet.  When you do meet her for lunch, you want to keep things light with non-stressful conversation.

Make sure you complement her but don't overdo it.  Tell her that she looks great and ask her how things have been.  It is okay to let her know that you miss her but don't go overboard.  You don't want to scare her away.  By giving her the space she needs and not pressuring her into coming back or discussing the situation, you let her see a stronger side of you.  She may be more prone to discussing the topic and bringing it up on her own when she sees this side of you.  What you want to do is show her that you understand you made mistakes and that you really can be the man that she fell in love with.

Once you have your foot in the door with lunch meetings, you may want to try meeting in the evening and see how things go.  Do not pressure her into coming back and give her the space she wants when she asks for it.  You will see that she will start to come around wanting to be around you more and more, smiling more and more that she may even start flirting with you again.  When the lines of communication are fully open and you've gotten past all of the other things, you want to let her know that you do appreciate her and respect her and that you want to make things right.  You will find that the two of you are well on your way to reconciliation.  Just play your cards right and you'll have your wife back in no time.